Matt Bellassai

Matt Bellassai

@@mattbellassai

Internet drunk. Writer. Actual People's Choice Award Winner. Author of EVERYTHING IS AWFUL, out October 24, 2017. Host of UNHAPPY HOUR the podcast.

New York City

19440 Tweets 354331 Followers 546 Followings


Matt Bellassai

nobody touches my beautiful son https://t.co/z4FrJES5Fc

10h / 748 Retweets / 4704 Likes

Matt Bellassai

RT @917wvxu : Pre-order tickets to see @GretchenCarlson & @MattBellassai at @BBTB_cincy on Saturday. The BBTB Facebook page has details. htt…

12h / 2 Retweets / 0 Likes

Matt Bellassai

RT @reader : The true story of how @MattBellassai fell in love with his straight BFF (it didn’t go well) & finally came out. https://t.co/yq…

15h / 11 Retweets / 0 Likes

Matt Bellassai

RT @DDirecto : 1 year after meeting Oprah, I got to drink wine & rant about stuff w @MattBellassai . Now I'm retired. https://t.co/j7jujUSb15…

16h / 2 Retweets / 0 Likes

Matt Bellassai

RT @simonschuster : Check out @BuzzFeed 's early look at @MattBellassai 's forthcoming #EverythingIsAwful (out this Tuesday)! https://t.co/t3S…

16h / 2 Retweets / 0 Likes

Matt Bellassai

currently sitting at a table of straight people disparaging Beyoncé and i can feel my muscles Hulking beneath my blubber

1d / 228 Retweets / 4682 Likes

Matt Bellassai

@Harry_Styles u up?

1d / 599 Retweets / 3508 Likes

Matt Bellassai

tanning in LA before her debut in THREE DAYS pre-order so her sunburn is worth it: https://t.co/NSvKNdoFz0 https://t.co/Hyc8IFtcxO

tanning in LA before her debut in THREE DAYS

pre-order so her sunburn is worth it: https://t.co/NSvKNdoFz0 https://t.co/Hyc8IFtcxO

1d / 5 Retweets / 162 Likes

Matt Bellassai

this starbucks just played shawn mendes and niall horan back to back and i want to meet the twink barista who made this happen

1d / 648 Retweets / 7491 Likes

Matt Bellassai

@Kitty_16 it’s not! tickets are here: https://t.co/hBhHX7hZc4

2d / 0 Retweets / 1 Likes

Matt Bellassai

RT @Chelseashow : Open the hatch. @MattBellassai is streaming now. #TGIF #staythirsty https://t.co/ALeqMjBfyl

RT @Chelseashow: Open the hatch. @MattBellassai is streaming now. #TGIF #StayThirsty https://t.co/ALeqMjBfyl

2d / 40 Retweets / 0 Likes

Matt Bellassai

@carmelita_cle I’LL BE IN CLEVELAND ON NOVEMBER 7TH READ THE THING MA’AM

2d / 0 Retweets / 6 Likes

Matt Bellassai

im going to 25 goddamn cities so you better buy my fucking book cause i'll probably die on the road and i want my obituary to be good

2d / 17 Retweets / 832 Likes

Matt Bellassai

EVERYTHING IS AWFUL IS OUT IN 4 DAYS AND ALSO THE EVERYTHING IS AWFUL TOUR STARTS IN 4 DAYS PRE-ORDER. GET YA TIX. https://t.co/NSvKNdGgqy https://t.co/4XOg0lsN4E

EVERYTHING IS AWFUL IS OUT IN 4 DAYS AND ALSO THE EVERYTHING IS AWFUL TOUR STARTS IN 4 DAYS

PRE-ORDER. GET YA TIX. https://t.co/NSvKNdGgqy https://t.co/4XOg0lsN4E

2d / 10 Retweets / 366 Likes

Matt Bellassai

does every muscle bro with no neck and chicken legs get basketball shorts and shin-high black socks in their bro initiation basket?

2d / 239 Retweets / 2319 Likes

Matt Bellassai

RT @nerdist : #mothership is live in 5 min w/ hosts @JessicaChobot + @Hectorisfunny plus guests @DanCasey and @MattBellassai : https://t.co/T…

3d / 2 Retweets / 0 Likes

Matt Bellassai

im “cries every single time he listens to the landslide cover by Beyoncé backup singers the dixie chicks” years old

3d / 204 Retweets / 2440 Likes

Matt Bellassai

very special to be staying in west hollywood on the national holiday of zac efron’s birthday

4d / 104 Retweets / 2350 Likes

Matt Bellassai

RT @Chelseashow : Streaming this Friday: #DennisQuaid, Rep. @NancyPelosi , @ChrissyMetz , @MollyBSims , and @MattBellassai ✨ https://t.co/2i2QZ…

4d / 42 Retweets / 0 Likes

Matt Bellassai

back on the @Chelseashow this week embarrassing myself as usual https://t.co/KyZVwtyvC1

back on the @Chelseashow this week embarrassing myself as usual https://t.co/KyZVwtyvC1

4d / 13 Retweets / 858 Likes

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